My Heart is Heavy

The only site I go on and talk with others (Christian mothers who have large families) for the past 6 years, has a dear woman who has been fighting cancer for the past year. She’s only 31 years old and they have 5 children. She has only 1 to 2 weeks left to live. It is hard to think about anything else, buying a home or anything else that is just so small compared to life. Please pray for this precious family. Read their story and see their photos and grieve with and for them as we are here:

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/staceyhartfeld/journal

We’re Back Home

We closed on our home on Friday early afternoon and hit the freeways towards Washington State. We arrived here in good spirits last night (Sunday) to a fully furnished, 3 bedroom apartment from Alfreds Incorporated. They didn’t forget a thing… they had us set up with not only dishes, beds, dressers and the works, but also soap, laundry soap, foil and all the little things that make life livable.  : )  Our kids all woke up at 5:00 because their bodies are telling them it is 7:00… but we all had a great night sleep. We’re in a very quiet complex in a very nice area that is quite clean like Sammamish in Washington.

Yesterday when we stopped for gas, a miracle happened. I got out of the car to put gas in and went back in the car to find it locked and with the keys in the car. Little Matthew was sitting between the babies in the backseat and could not get out of the seatbelt. Matthew kept trying to talk Matthew into unlocking the belt and I went in to the restroom. I was so scared. I prayed that the Lord would help. I got out and Matthew still could not get Matthew out of his belt to unlock the door. All of a sudden, my husband pulled out his Chevy Truck key and inserted it into the door lock and turned and opened the door. He said, “I can’t believe it, I just felt the Lord telling me to put my key in your door and the door opened.” We were both astonished. I just had to get in my seat and shut and lock the door to have him try it again and he did. The key wouldn’t go in 1/16th of an inch. We both can’t believe the miracle the Lord did. You always hear of Him doing miracles for others or read of the miracles of the Lord in the past but when it happens to you, it almost scares you because you see how big God is and you see that He really is here.

We’ll have lots of time here since we don’t have any animals anymore to tend to, etc… so I will be taking pictures and writing more on the blog in my spare time. It feels so good to be back home.

One  more thing… On the West side of South Dakota, just before heading into Wyoming, I smelled the sweetest smell while driving for hours. It was white pine trees and I couldn’t believe how beautiful the air smelled. It was so wonderful to see trees, rivers, streams and mountains again. What I always perceived as dark (all the trees), I see so beautiful now. I did not cry when we left Washington a year ago, but I shed a tear when I saw the sign, “Welcome to Washington.”

Possibly Our Last Baby


We have just found that we are due to have another baby around November 21st this year. We know that if I don’t miscarry that this could be our last baby. We prayed years ago for 5 children and knew we would have five, but when my husband prayed a couple of years ago for eight, I knew it would probably only be possible if I had twins.  : ) I’ll be coming up on the age of 44 when I deliver this child and my cycles are becoming more sporatic… one was only 23 days long. So, I try to be realistic and rest in the Lord that I probably won’t be one of those women having children until the age of 47.

So now my biggest concern is having 4 or 5 children ages 2 and under. We currently have 4 children ages 3 and under right now so maybe it wouldn’t really be much different. The twins are such a blessing right now that for me I think it’s easier having twins. It makes the countenance light seeing two smiley faces looking up at me all the time. They are easier than I’ve had with one at times. Leah is usually a doll (unless she is sent to her room for being bad), but Miriam is the one who makes the days seem long right now for me and my husband. She has a real fiesty temper and it starts in the morning and doesn’t stop until about 7:30 each evening.  : (

So, rejoice with us as this could very well be our last baby. We’re still hoping for one  more boy so Matthew can be a big brother  (and I can put him in all of Matthew’s adorable baby clothes that are packed away in a box), but we’ll take what the Lord give us. We pray that this one will stay too as I have had a few miscarriages already, but none while using progesterone which I am using right now. Oh, Lord this little life is in Your hands. We know this season is soon to come to an end. May You give us strength in body and mind to bear with the few more hard years that lay ahead of us. Thank You for giving us strength and great joy during each pregnancy. Each pregnancy renews life within my husband and I and we find it bonds us together deeper and our steps are much lighter. Give us strength during the first 4 months after the baby is born as it is the hardest on our marriage and hardest on my mind with the Post partum depression. Let me know that it too has an end and let my husband bear with me gently. Let me be soft with my words Oh Lord. Thank You for this blessing You have bestowed upon us my Lord. Amen.

We’re Moving Back to Washington State

KFWe have decided to move back to Washington State to the Kettle Falls area. We’ve had some unfortunate things happen to us from the first days upon the purchase of our home (and with the purchase of our home) and over the course of the past year. We have just come to the conclusion that people and things are no different in Iowa, Pennsylvania or Washington State. Where different States used to be quite diverse from other States 100 years ago, by culture, ethnicity and religion, it no longer holds. We see the common culture that binds most people together here in America has to do with the television, movies, clothing and the places ventured on the internet. So, after going through most of the country last year and spending one year here in Iowa, we’ve come to the conclusion that it really is all the same.

Now we’re excited to get back to what’s familiar to us as I’ve been in Washington all my 42 years and Matthew from California for 26 years. We’re looking at an area that’s on what they call the “sunny side of the State about 7 1/2 hours from where we lived in Washington last year. There are mountains and valleys, lots of trees, a nice low humidity Summer, lots of snow in the Winter and a very hearty land for growing just about anything you want in the Summer. We are moving in less than 2 weeks from this home on March 15th and will be staying in a apartment temporarily as we look at 2 homes in that area (2 1/2 hours from Spokane) and then wait to close on one of the homes. Here are some pictures of Kettle Falls and the area:

Kettle Falls

Newport, Washington to Ione, Washington - day 40 114

Kettle Falls only has a population of 1,500 people and the nearest larger town of around 4,500 people that has a Walmart is only 12 miles away. People up there are largely into growing their own vegetables, meat and milk and using their own fiber for knitting, etc… We miss having a home as we did in Washington and just have never felt like it was home here. We used to raise turkeys, ducks and a few cattle here and there. We just do not have the room here outside in the barn or with the irregular, hilly land to live as we used to in Washington. My kitchen is about half the size here and I struggle with making room for the vegetables and things that they bring in the back door to wash up for the freezer. We’ve looked at many homes last year that were fairly cheap and would give us an extra $500 a month in our bank account, but we found that they needed extensive work such as new windows or the floors were quite crooked and we would end up paying such an extensive amount of money on some of these older homes that it just wasn’t worth it. So, we are looking at something that fits our lifestyle more. We’re looking for a real farm again and with a kitchen to support it. Being nestled in a community that is not apt to grow much over our lifetime, we hope to meet some good people to work with and some others to fellowship with too.

So, keep us in your prayers. We’ll take pictures on our way back home and I’ll post some here and there as I am able. We know what we’re in for and while things worked very well on our travels and wait for the home to close last year, I’m hoping it will only go smoother and we will never have to do this again.  : )  It will be good to go home again.